When God crushes you: what a difference a year makes!
I had no clue what God was going to do with us this past year. I had a ton of thoughts about what God would do but none of those happened. I really thought I would be pastoring again at this point and that hasn't happened. I thought we might plant another church and that hasn't happened. I thought that I would finish school and that hasn't happened (I know it sounds depressing but just wait). What has happened is God showing us His incredible faithfulness and that He always has a plan He is working us through.
When I left Hawaii, it was overwhelmingly obvious that God has changed our course (not His course but where we thought we were headed). I had planned on us being in Hawaii for the rest of our lives, planting churches all over the Pacific rim. However, as I am even more sure today and that day that we got on that plane; I know hat God had completed what He brought us to Hawaii to do. I was a prideful man when I went to Hawaii and needed to be broken. I realize more and more that I would have been a dangerous pastor if God would have given us the vision we thought we had. I would have been unapproachable and stubborn. I would have driven people too hard and walked around arrogantly thinking I had all the answers. No, my Daddy would not let me continue on that path nor would He let me harm His kids that He would entrust to my leading. So He crushed me and then began the work of putting me back together and making more like His Son.
When I look back on that emotional day, I am thankful that God loves me enough to break me and restore Himself in me. I see how He has used this past year; waiting on Him to provide and waiting on opportunities to preach His Word. He has honored Himself through me allowing me to speak the truths He is planting in me. How incredible He is not to let me become satisfied with me but only be satisfied in Him more. I am not the same man and I praise My Daddy for that. He is a good Daddy but also is the most powerful King and Ruler of this universe. His kindness has truly brought me to repentance.
Now, there is a new journey on the horizon. Something that excites me more and more. However, I cannot tell you about it until God brings it to fruition. I would just ask you to continue to pray with us as we move forward and love on those around us. Let us rejoice that God is faithful to His work and His plans. Let us also find joy that when our plans are not His, He will not allow us to be satisfied in those plans, but only in Him!
"God is most glorified in you when you are most satisfied in Him" John Piper